Mindfulness and a Belly Full of Gratitude

I am mindful when I am in my warm home.  I am aware that my refrigerator and pantry are stocked full of food.  Electricity and water are current.  I see my boys clean from the prior nights bath, knowing that they were scrubbed with organic products.  Hair combed nicely, teeth brushed with a good floss.  I see the plethora of books in each of their bookshelves.  Knowing that they are used, several times a day.  Either them or I reading, yet heard by all.  A playroom endlessly full of toys.  I see the vast wood piles still stacked high, although we have had fires nearly every day and night.  I see a house that is lived in, yet clean.  Free of clutter and full of nice products.  I am blessed with getting to take a nice hot shower every night.  Stepping out onto soft, clean towels, using lovely lotion reminiscent of Hawaii.  I see the smiling faces that inhabit this home.  Everyone’s needs are met.

I refuse to take for granted what I have.  There are those that are much less fortunate.  Yet the absurdity that, after I all I have, I still dream of hardwood floors, granite countertops and furniture I am continually eyeing from Pottery Barn.  All I can say is that I am human.  I get caught up.  When I bring my thoughts back home, to a more mindful place, I am instantly reminded that what I have is all I need.

I am reminded constantly by news stories that there are 5-year-old children who have to dress and feed themselves.  With no moral support.  Books are of a rarity.  A stocked pantry is what dreams are made of.  A loving embrace from a parent is all they yearn for.

There are young women brutally harmed because they were born women.

There are whole societies who wonder when and where they can achieve clean water.

There are young men, pushed to fight without choice, for a cause they have yet to understand.

There are so many other brutal stories out there.  Some that haunt me for months.  Some years.

I am not sure if it is my sensitivity level, or lack of a personal shield.  Nevertheless, I feel their pain.

The gut wrenching stories are nearly overwhelming.  As I lay down on my freshly laundered, organic cotton sheets and start to fall asleep to my iPhone’s meditation app, still warm from the hot shower I had just taken, I remember.  I remember always with that constant wonder…..what can I do?  How can this one person, who has no extra money to donate, make a difference?

If I had the knowledge and passion as I do now-that a world exists outside of my ego when I was in my late teens to early twenties-I am sure that I would have chosen a different path than that of which I am on.  I have to trust that for some reason I am on this immobile path.  That instead of worrying constantly of people and situations I have no control over, I need to focus my energies on my primary purpose: raising two humans to be as sympathetic and compassionate as I hope to be.  That is my primary purpose, and because of that….I turn off the news and bypass the headlines that read “Screaming Toddler Found Locked in a Cage, Dad Arrested.”

There is a thought.  May be controversial, but it is there.  I grasp on to it like there is no other choice because it is the only thing that makes the dull ache in my gut subside.  There is a thought that we pick and choose who our parents and situations will be well before conception.  That we are all on this earth, in our own specific circumstances for a reason.  To learn a lesson we may have not learned so well in our prior lifetime.  Instead of pushing my thoughts and actions onto others (unless I see true harm done to a child), I need to trust in the Universe or some higher power that all is where it is supposed to be.  Helping where appropriate.

The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others. ~Gandhi

I will do as much as I can, while still pouring my heart into my primary purpose, which is to parent.  I parent by example.  I confess when I make a mistake.  I make amends to my children when necessary.  I forgive my children always.  I never let a day go by without telling my children how happy I am that they are here.  What wonderful humans they are.  That no matter what “Mama loves you”.  The communication is abundant.  I never want to assume they know.

Wherever I am supposed to be, I will be.  That starts right here.  What can I do right now to make this world a better place?  For starters, it is getting off my laptop and reading a book with my kids.

Gratitude and mindfulness, they are the driving forces behind my knowing smile.

All pictures pleasantly plucked from Bing Images.